Saturn Squares Venus

A time when loves gets heavy

 

Astrology can work for us... or against us. When serious Saturn squares Venus, ruler of love, it's one of those not so great days when it comes to matters of the heart. At this time, romantic matters take on all the worst aspects of both planets, providing fertile ground for arguments and tests of your relationship's viability.

Keeping that in mind, here are five tips for handling conflict with your loved one every day - and especially when Saturn squares Venus.

Press pause
This sounds obvious, but it's very important to remember that you can't take back what you say. Unfortunately there is no rewind button for life and though you may want to scream your head off and spit out the meanest things that come to mind in the heat of the moment (especially if you're an Aries or a Scorpio!), your words will come back to bite you. One of the best ways to avoid inappropriate outbursts (however well deserved - you should never want to hurt the person you love), is to speak up when something is bothering you. By voicing your concerns before they escalate you help to prevent the unfortunate, stinging slip of the tongue.

Careful consideration
Think about it. Are his remote control hogging ways really worth a full blown fight? I doubt it. If he's insistent upon watching a game on television, and you're not a fan, go in the other room... or better yet, do something else altogether that you enjoy. You can spend time together later. If this was your scheduled time together and he thinks something else is more important, then speak about it calmly. But try not to be the nag. In other words, if your partner is usually perfectly attentive and considerate and simply wants to do something alone, today is not the day to make a fuss about it. Things will get much bigger than you intended them to and you may find that you wish you'd chosen your battles more carefully.

Remain calm
First, nothing is more scary than someone being irrational. If you want to be heard, theatrics are not the best way to make someone listen. If indeed, you hit a serious stumbling block, you want to do your best to remain grounded and speak your feelings - not scream them. If your partner initiates the craziness, don't agree to go there. Taking the higher road may be tough (hell, it may be damn near impossible sometimes), but if you can manage to do it, you'll feel all the better later. And they took the low road, you'll be the one with the upper hand... not that anyone's counting.

Leave the past behind
Patterns are one thing. If there is a repetitive behavior going on it may be necessary to briefly indicate how this has happened before. However, much more often, when the past comes up in arguments, it's about old grudges or settling a score. The simple truth is, if you and your lover have elected to stay together despite some past trouble, it's pretty much off the table - unless it's happened again. If they once said something to you or did something that you keep on bringing up however, you're just rehashing the past... and missing what's going on at the moment. Which, may actually be troublesome based on the fact that you're stuck in the land of yesterday. Assess what is going on in the now. And deal with it. Clear the air calmly and be present so that you can create a happier future.

On point
This goes hand in hand with not bringing up the past - and knowing what's important to you. No matter how tempted you are, try not to segue into all the little things that piss you off, or some other subject that you feel needs attention in your relationship. Like so many other tasks, relationship needs require prioritizing. This is for several reasons, not least of which is the fact that men think (and act) more singularly than women, who are more skilled at multi-tasking (trust us, it's documented). If you want to get anything accomplished with a serious discussion, you need to be targeted and tackle things one at a time.

Does this mean everything can't wind up part of the same discussion? No. But a littany of requests, dramas or problems is probably going to make your partner run in the other direction. Which is not what you want to do... particularly when Saturn squares Venus. And if your lover is the one starting the melee, opt out. Or at least see number one through four.

In short, when Saturn squares Venus, try to keep things as breezy as possible. You can argue in a day or so, if need be, when the planets are better aligned to support your growth as a pair. But in any case - and on any day - do try to discuss things first. After all, communication is the key to any relationship, whether you're dealing with serious matters like committment and marriage or day to day things like what to have for dinner!