Your Mistletoe Moment

Making room for romance during this busy season

by Martine Jeanne Craughley
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In these fast paced days, holidays can fill people with as much anticipation as gloom. There are looming financial and social obligations - and family interactions that can range from delightful to dreadful. With parties to attend; presents to buy, wrap and post; the annual office party to endure, it can be difficult for that loving feeling to have sway over you. With so much to do, it's tough to even find time for romance.

If you're single and unattached, take advantage of as many holiday parties as possible this year. If you want to expand your circle beyond friends and family, look for holiday events: charity auctions, museum events, alumni gatherings, and church events - wherever you think you might be interested in going. Many cities have events for singles; this time of year is a great time to dive in. If your company allows it, bring a girlfriend to your annual company party and then go to hers. Be a bit creative, go a little further afield and you may bring home the best present of all - a new love.

If you're single and attached, don't let competing expectations from both your families and your friends run you ragged. Sit down together and pick and choose which events to go to, making sure to schedule in some evenings meant only for you two. Savor some warm evenings spent in front of the fire, wine glasses in hand and clothing scattered on the rug. Moments set aside for pleasure will keep you refreshed enough to enjoy the holiday spirit. On other evenings when you have to go to family gatherings, you'll find you have the patience to endure the family parties with the terminally tedious Aunt Harriet.

If you're married, it's easy to forget that you don't have to maintain both sets of families holiday traditions and meet all their expectations. You're a family now, and you can (and should) decide together how you want to experience the holidays as a couple. It's important for you two to make sure to clear your schedule, ideally one evening a week for just the two of you to lavish attention on each other. Marriage can stay sweetly sensual if you remain committed to making romance and sex as important as your other obligations. They say it takes work to keep a relationship fresh and vital, but deep down who doesn't finally enjoy this type of 'work'?

If you've got kids and family staying with you, you know how hard it is to steal time for romance. Nonetheless, try to make it a priority. If it's impossible while everyone's camped at your house, save some money for a babysitter, slip away to a motel for an hour, or go to a hotel for an evening after the holidays are over. It's important to try to remember that your most important relationship needs a little loving care too - the best present anyone can give is his or her commitment to love.

It's never that easy to find love, or find time for it. Let this holiday season be the time that you make a real commitment to making Love, and making love last, so when you think of this Christmas, you'll get a little warm flush of pleasure.



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