Issues of control often get in the way of true love and happiness in relationships. When one person blames the other for all that goes wrong between the couple, or is the "fall person" for the other partner's unhappiness, unconditional love cannot thrive.
Controlling love has all kinds of conditions that go with it: "I'll love you if… you don't make me angry, you run the house as I say, you do what I want…" These are the kinds of demands that weaken the partners of "control freaks," who often exercise their power and judgment over their significant other in the name of love. After 31 years as a professional Clairvoyant, Clairaudient, Clairsentient and Medium, Debra ext. 9596, says she is well versed in these patterns of human nature. Many of her callers are being controlled.
Kylie (not her real name) called Debra after six weeks of silence from her boyfriend of eight months. Spencer (not his real name) had broken up with Kylie several times in the past, but he would usually let her know that he'd decided to end the relationship. This time there wasn't a phone call, a text message, or an email explanation - only painful silence.
"Will he come back?" the caller asked Debra, who says that she has always been accurate about relationships.
As she set out the Tarot to get an overview of the situation, the psychic replied, "Oh, you had a big fight!"
Then the Medium got into Spencer's head "medium-istically," as Debra describes it. "You didn't do what I asked," she heard him say. "It's a punishment. He's angry, not furious," she related to Kylie, before saying that she was seeing a reunion in the future.
"When," the caller asked?
"Three weeks… but you cannot reach out to him. He will call you. If you call him, it won't bring him back." The psychic understood as she went further into the reading that should Kylie "pester" him, it would anger him further, rather than lead to reparations. "He'll continue the silent treatment," Debra warned.
Debra's words were not a surprise to the young woman, who said she had sensed Spencer's disappointment in the weeks before his blow-up. "This makes sense," she told Debra, who was concerned about the way Spencer was controlling Kylie.
"Three more weeks?" she asked.
"Three, more weeks," she answered, "…if you don't call him first. And when he does call, be sweet but cool. Don't overreact," she concluded.
The following week, Kylie checked in with Debra for reassurance that she was on the right track. The Clairvoyant encouraged her client to keep the faith. To help hold back her urges to call Spencer, the spiritual counselor suggested that she use the time to imagine herself in a balanced loving relationship.
Weeks later, Kylie contacted Debra opening the call with any psychic's favorite words, "You were right!" Spencer had finally called to "check in" after almost three months of no communication. As Debra had suggested, Kylie toughed it out and waited for Spencer to suggest getting together to talk.
This is where Kylie's real work, needed to begin, explained Debra, who understood that it was time to help her client deal with her boyfriend's control issues. The fact that he was punishing her with his silence was a huge red flag. As Debra continued to look into the situation between the couple, Debra also saw Spencer as being so moody that the slightest thing would set him off. Kylie confirmed Debra's take on him.
This time, Kylie wanted to be strong enough to walk away from Spencer if he wasn't agreeable to her terms. She was clear that it would be up to her to reconfigure the relationship the psychic recalls. "I kept seeing 'new beginnings,' a sign that a healthier relationship was possible."
If Kylie found herself agreeable to a fresh start with Spencer, Debra suggested the powerful words, "I'm a whole human being with free will. You do not have a right to control me," as a condition of their reunion.
Kylie called Debra again, saying that her boyfriend had heard her and accepted her conditions. "Now," the young woman proposed wisely, "only time would tell, if we can make it as a couple."
"I'd say that 75% of my callers who are having problems in relationships are dealing with control issues. I do a lot of training on how to get around them - after all love is much more fun when you aren't nagging each other."
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